INEVITABLE: A Contemporary Sports Romance Page 2
They stopped their conversation when they noticed me in the room. This, I feared, was not a good sign. I prayed Mrs. Washington’s visit had nothing to do with my sudden interest in watching her son. I don’t think he saw when I peeked into his window last night. That would be so embarrassing, not to mention, I would be dead meat as far as my parents were concerned.
“Lily,” my dad began, “We’ve decided you are going to tutor Mrs. Washington’s son, JJ, tomorrow after church. He is almost failing Algebra II. Since you are in his class and acing everything, it makes sense for you to help him. You will meet with him for an hour and a half every Sunday afternoon and Wednesdays after practice until he brings his math grade up well above passing. If other days are needed, you’ll be available for those as well.” Leave it to my dad to have my entire schedule planned out without even considering my plans.
My mouth hung open. In a million years, I would have never predicted this. I was eager to spend time with my hot neighbor, but it also made me nervous.
Shocked, I just stood there trying to figure out what to say. I didn’t want to seem too quick to agree and have my mother suspect my crush on JJ. That was information she would use against me. With her, the less she knew, the better.
“I’d pay you, of course,” Mrs. Washington said when I still hadn’t responded.
“Don’t be silly, Krissy.” My mom gave me a death glare before she fixed her expression to face our neighbor. “Lily, doesn’t need to be paid.”
“Lily, is a team player,” my dad responded in agreement while he clamped his hand down on my shoulder. “If it helps the Rangers, she’ll be happy to do it. You don’t need to pay her.”
Thanks a lot, Mom and Dad, I thought. I could have used that money, but the thought of spending a few hours a week with JJ did funny things to my insides… even if I knew he would never see me as anything but his mousy little neighbor. “It’s fine, Mrs. Washington. I’m happy to do it,” I said once I found my voice.
Later that night, I scanned various videos on an adult website trying to learn more about what that girl was doing to JJ. The longer I watched the clips, the more I felt like I did the other night when I rocked on my heel. I also felt kind of sick inside, like maybe I shouldn’t be seeing these things. When I had to lie that I was eighteen to click on this site, it felt like I was doing something wrong. After several clicks, I cleared my browsing history, put my iPad away, and decided to get some sleep.
Just as I was about to close my eyes, movement in the window across the lawn caught my attention. JJ and his father were engaged in a heated argument. I couldn’t tell what it was about, but Mr. Washington stood over JJ pointing his finger while JJ sat at the foot of the bed. He was slumped forward and his head rested in his hands. I moved to the window to see if I could hear anything. Right when I got about two feet from the windowsill, JJ looked up. His eyes met mine, and he tilted his head. I let out a squeak and backpedaled to my bed. Terrified he saw me in the dark and would tell on me, I got in bed and pulled the covers tight over my head. I didn’t dare peek again until my alarm went off.
The next morning when my alarm went off, I hazarded a glance next door. To my chagrin, JJ’s blinds were pulled tight. He never closed his blinds. Great, I thought. He would tell my dad I spied on him, and I would be in so much trouble.
I didn’t have time to get worked up because my mom popped into my room and flung open my closet doors. Let the primping begin, I thought as I willed myself to not roll my eyes or sigh. That would never go over well with my mother. I tried to think pleasant thoughts, so my serene expression revealed nothing. Not like that tactic ever worked in the past, but it was worth a shot.
Church was never my favorite because I knew my mom expected me to let her use me as her personal doll she could make acceptable enough to be seen in public. Despite her preparations, I still looked like a flat-chested tomboy which infuriated her to no end. I could never please her with my behavior around people she wanted to impress. For some reason, this had gotten even worse with each year that passed.
“Ugh, Lily, you’re not even showered yet! Hurry and go clean up. Make sure you wash that dreaded dog smell out of your hair. Don’t you dare forget to use the new setting spray I bought you yesterday for your hair. I’ll blow dry it straight for you and then we can curl it. Maybe then you’ll look even like a girl.” She made sure to get in a dig about my tomboy tendencies.
“Okay, Mother.” I retreated into the bathroom, knowing not to take too long in the shower. I had no idea why she needed to straighten my hair to make it curly, but I knew better than to ask. Questions like that would earn me a slap in the face or a pinch on one of my triceps. Nothing was more painful than a twist to the skin behind your arm.
When I returned from my shower, my mom had a new gray sweater dress laid out across my bed. She wanted me to pair it with an orange plaid scarf, opaque black tights, and black ballet slippers. At least, I would be somewhat comfortable even if Septembers in Texas were a little too hot for this outfit. My mother seemed to forget we weren’t in Kansas anymore. I wished I could wear my Converse instead of the shoes she chose. The ballet flats were slippery on the bottom and I was a little clumsy so I was afraid I would fall and embarrass myself, or worse yet, embarrass my mother. Plus, they pinched my toes. If I mentioned that to my mother, she would go on a rant about how beauty was pain, so I just picked up the dress and pulled it over my head.
As I shoved my feet into the shoes, my mom came back in my room, not bothering to knock, armed with a basket overflowing with hair stuff along with her bulging makeup bag. I plopped into my desk chair and picked up my book. At least, I could get some reading done while she groomed me into what she deemed a less embarrassing version of myself. Plus, I needed a distraction from the way my mother loved to pull my hair. If I reacted, she would only tug on it harder, as if she got a sick satisfaction from my discomfort and pain.
Once my mom finished with my hair, which she made me keep long, it was time for her to move on to my makeup. She painted, huffed, pulled, plucked, and frowned until she was satisfied. I looked and felt ridiculous.
“Well, we did the best we could with what we have to work with.” My mom sighed, shaking her head. I tried not to let it show how much her words stung. She then collected her torture devices, having spent more time with me than she liked. Before leaving my room, she turned back, “Be in the car in 5 minutes. And don’t you dare touch your hair or face.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I responded. I tried not to let the tear that was threatening to spill run down my face. Crying served no purpose other than to make my mother furious I’d messed up her hard work.
She huffed and then slammed the door behind her. I looked again at JJ’s house. His blinds were open once again, and he stood at his window looking right at me. It embarrassed me he saw what my mother had done to me. Now he would think I was trying to be something I wasn’t… beautiful. Gorgeous girls always surrounded him at school. He probably thought I was trying to be like them after he saw me spying on him last night. JJ smiled sadly, lifted his hand, and waved at me before he turned and exited his room.
Chapter Two
JJ
Just by glancing across the lawn, it was obvious that sadness consumed the girl next door. She looked like a little kid from afar, but I had a few classes with her so I knew she was in high school. When seated next to her in class, I could tell she was much older than she appeared at first glance. Head down, nose in a book, she seemed beyond the rest of us. I’d heard she was the coach’s daughter and some sort of genius, but that was all I knew about her. She sat next to me in my Algebra II class, but I had never heard her speak. The girl next door hadn’t been a blip on my radar before now.
Once I’d gotten past her small size, I realized she was a pretty girl whom I was certain would one day be beautiful despite her awkwardness. Long dark hair with crystal blue eyes and a small frame made her look like one of those cartoon princesses my cousins loved. Although I was drawn to her, I knew better than to so much as look at the coach’s daughter. Plus, I liked the girls who weren’t so complicated.
This girl radiated strength and sadness, which made me want to learn all of her secrets. If I were strong like her, maybe I could call out my friends when they said shit about me not really being black, or make jokes at my expense. If I was courageous enough, I could stand up to some of the people in this town when they called me horrible names they didn’t think I heard.
Maybe I could tell my black teammates who called me Oreo, how shitty that was. When we were kids, we all played together, but as we got older, they let me know I didn’t belong. I wished I could tell them, I’m not any different from them, but they’d never see it that way. My skin may look brown, but I didn’t fit. Plus, they hated law enforcement. To them, my daddy was a traitor. The only time they accepted me was when I called plays and threw touchdown passes.
Two years ago, we had to change churches because my parents broke an unwritten rule that was sacred in the south. We used to go to the black church in town, but after the sermon where the preacher said white women were taking black men away from black women, we no longer pretended we belonged there.
The way my mother’s face looked that day was etched into my memory. She was horrified. As soon as the preacher made that statement, my father stood in the middle of the sermon and pulled my mother and me out the doors. My mother’s silent tears in the car ride home were never addressed, but after that we decided my mother and I would go to a different church w
hile my father used Sunday mornings for yardwork.
Seeing Lily through the window last night was mortifying. She caught my dad reading me the riot act after he discovered I failed my last math test. I wondered if she heard him through the window. Football was my ticket out of Redville, and I had to treat it like a job. My dad knew firsthand just how hard a small town like this was for someone like me.
When I first caught her staring, I thought it was because she knew I was stupid. My dad told me that since I couldn’t get my shit together enough to pass math on my own, Coach’s daughter was going to tutor me. My self-esteem took a hit with that, but when I saw how her mom tried to make her into a miniature pageant girl and erased all of her natural beauty, I knew that girl across the yard and I were kindred spirits. Two outcasts in a world we were desperate to find a place we fit.
When she turned to look at me, I waved to show her I understood her pain. Plus, how bad could she be? She was Coach’s daughter. If she could help me understand quadratic equations, I would try to help her make friends with some of the Freshmen cheerleaders that followed me around school. Not girls like Mandy Pitcher, of course. She was better than Mandy.
Mandy was easy. She followed me home the other day and in a moment of weakness; I let her into my bedroom. While I was glad I got a BJ out of it, I didn’t want a repeat performance. She was clingy, had a reputation of getting with other players on the team. Not to mention, she wasn’t that good. I only let her inside my window because her father called me the n-word at the gas station earlier that afternoon. He thought I didn’t hear him, but I heard; I always heard. I smiled as I pictured the look on his red, bloated face when he found out I blew my load in the mouth of his little princess. I tried to be a decent guy most of the time, but I was a seventeen-year-old who enjoyed getting laid. I was also petty enough to exact revenge on the assholes who discriminated against me.
My dad may have been the law, my mom the hometown sweetheart, and me the QB1, but there was no confusion to any of us. They did not accept my family in Redville. We represented something that made the people of this town angry, and it was there under the surface of every interaction. My parents committed the ultimate sin, and as their offspring, I was an abomination.
After every Sunday service, there was a potluck held in the meeting hall that the ladies of the Junior League threw. Since my mom was known for her baking, she provided several pies or desserts each week—none of which she dared to eat. I once asked her about that and she laughed it off, but later I found out she was anorexic. She tried to get help for it, but it never worked. My parents kept it hush-hush.
Plate piled high, my mouth watered at all the delicious food before me. I loved a good home-cooked meal, and those Junior League ladies knew their way around a kitchen. As I tried to find an open spot left on my plate for a big scoop of fried okra, the tension between Lily and her mother caught my attention. Coach’s wife looked furious while Lily stood there impassive, her body almost folded in on itself, as she tried to make herself as small as possible.
My eyes fell to her plate. My mother’s anorexia came to mind. Lily was so tiny I wondered if she was anorexic too. She had one little piece of chicken and tiny scoops of two sides. There was more bare plate than there was food. I inched closer, trying to hear what her mother said to her. I hoped she was trying to get her to eat more food.
Mrs. Gate’s words shocked me when I was close enough to hear them. “Honestly, Lily!” she hissed. “Do you want to be a porker?! You know you’re on a diet!”
I jerked back in surprise, which caught her attention. “JJ, Son, how are you?” she asked as she switched personalities. I tipped my head to her, but kept my eyes on the petite girl next to her.
“I’m good, Ma’am. And you?”
While our conversation distracted her mother, Lily hurried away from the buffet and found a place at an empty table. As soon as I escaped, I made a beeline toward her.
Lily placed her napkin in her lap, unaware of my approach. When I pulled out the chair next to her, it scraped across the linoleum floor. Surprise colored her face as she looked up to see me. She blushed from hairline to toes. I chuckled at her shyness. Seeing her this close confirmed just how cute Lily Gates was.
“Hey, so, I figured I should introduce myself to the girl who’s going to save my football career.” I smiled and reached my big hand toward her. “I’m JJ.”
She took my hand. “Hi. I, um, my, um… I’m Lily.” My large, calloused hand engulfed her small, soft one and made hers look like a toddler’s by comparison.
“Well, Lily, looks like it’s you and me against the world for the foreseeable future,” I teased as I released the delicate hand. I bumped shoulders with her in solidarity as the red in her cheeks deepened even more.
After the church lunch where I visited with the girl who would tutor me, I changed into some black nylon shorts and a gray Redville Rangers t-shirt before I walked next door with my math book and a spiral in hand. While I dreaded the math part, I looked forward to spending more time with the girl from next door. There was something about her that called to me. I wanted to know everything about her. I was transfixed.
School had been a struggle my entire life. I fought to focus on all the things they threw at me all at once. With math, I got distracted and forgot important steps when I tried to solve problems. I wanted help, but I dreaded spending the better part of my Sunday afternoons and Wednesday nights locked up with the neighbor girl explaining equations to me; the girl who didn’t seem so little the more time we spent together.
On the bright side, it was just a few hours a week. I hoped she’d let me copy her homework like some of the girls from the cheer squad. At least her answers would be correct. The cheerleader’s grades were almost as bad as mine, so copying off them didn’t do me much good.
Before my hand touched Coach’s front door, it flung open and revealed my pint-sized neighbor. I had to look down almost two feet to make eye contact with her. I hadn’t realized she was this tiny at lunch because we had been sitting down. Now that we were standing face to face, I realized she wasn’t even 5 feet tall. She was maybe 4’10 at most. It reminded again me how cute my tiny neighbor was.
I could tell she tried to scrub the makeup from earlier off her face, but ended up looking a bit like a raccoon. She reminded me of my kid cousins that were always getting into my auntie’s makeup. Lily’s long hair spilled over her shoulders and down the sides of her arms. With her hair wild and free, she resembled a warrior princess. She donned the same Redville Rangers t-shirt I wore. Hers, however, swallowed her. It was so long I could see just a sliver of her shorts peeking out of the bottom and lots of bare leg.
I chuckled at how silly yet evocative she looked. I shook my head to clear out that last thought, and willed myself to not check out her muscular legs. This little bit of a girl was going to save my football career. No distractions allowed, I reminded myself.
I was at a loss for words when I noticed she stared at me, head cocked to the side, expression confused. She seemed to look inside of me. It was uncomfortable, and I stalled.
I recovered when I realized she had no idea why I laughed at her. “Hey twin!” I said to put her at ease.
“Huh?” She looked bewildered, so I gestured back and forth between our matching t-shirts with my pointer finger.
Her cheeks reddened as she realized what I meant. “Right… uh, yeah…” she chuckled. “Oh, uh, come in,” she said, pulling the door open wider as she looked down and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. She met my eyes once more as twin pink circles tinged her cheeks. “I have my stuff set up in the living room. We can work there without being bothered.”
I stepped past her, through the entryway, and into the well decorated sitting room. With my back to her, I tried to be discreet as I adjusted myself in my thin shorts. Now was not the time to get excited, I reminded myself, looking around the room as I struggled to control my thoughts.
Lily plopped down and covered her bare legs with an orange State blanket, but not before I glimpsed something bright blue up her shorts. I groaned and looked away. Her appeal was harder to resist than I thought it would be.